How to Find Freedom from Indecision
This is a very uncomfortable place to be. I can tell you from a personal stand point that it has ruined many days for me. Days that I could have been working happily toward a goal, or could have been enjoying the little things in life that make it worth while. Unfortunately, anxiety for an unknown future leaves little room for that, and serious straight faces (anxiety faces) give little reminder that there is anything to be thankful for.
So, how can we hope to break the painful hesitation of not knowing which way to turn for the right path to take in life? You could think about it some more, and hope that it comes to you. However, over thinking has only lead me farther down the rabbit hole of what if stories where I am loosing every thing that I hold dear. It might not happen all at once, but it seems that my mind will take me there, if I am not making a constant effort to be more mindful about what my thoughts, feelings, and actions are. Being mindful will be what allows me to move onto clarity and focus. I talk about changing the ways that we behave more in my earlier blog, here:
How to Explore the Field of Happiness
These experiences can range from the very simple like taking a bath, washing the dishes, listening to the breeze blow gently through the leaves, or more complex activities like riding a horse, practicing yoga, drawing a picture, etc. You can find these experiences by simply being more aware of your own feelings when you experience life. Listen to yourself, and follow the path that they lay out before you. If you seem to like moving your body in energetic motions, try looking into some activities and clubs that practice/play sports, dance, yoga, etc. If you really like certain foods like fruits, learn more about them, and what kind of activities surround growing and eating them like farming and nutrition.
Whatever it is that makes you feel the happiest, and most alive, learn more about it, and how people use it in their lives. Experiment with new activities, by joining different clubs or groups, seeing new locations or sights until something gives you that ecstatic feeling of inspiration inside. As a personal practice I try to start small then increase my learning and involvement in things that continue to bring enjoyment to me. Be careful where you spend your time because that is one of your greatest irreplaceable gifts. If you are like me, you might invest yourself in studying something, and then find that it is not what you had hoped for. I have done this twice in the form of college degrees, although it is important to learn in your own way about what brings you joy in life, you might not want hefty student loans if that field of study doesn't seem to really align with your interests as you become more familiar with that vocation. So if you do intend to pursue an interest through to a vocation, my advice is try to live it as a vocation, and not just an interest. Talk to professionals in the field. Get involved in professional groups. Volunteer in that field if possible.
These are some resources that can help us in our search for clarity and focus what makes us happy in the midst of the many opportunities that life has for us:
Libby Serry, Psychotherapist, Counselor, Therapeutic Life Coach, and wonderful dear friend has written an amazing article on the subject of mindfulness and how to apply it to your life:
Paige Burkes has written a great article about how to apply mindfulness in achieving your goals:
How to Tell the Difference: Happiness or Pleasing?
I realized from my personal experience, through the teachings of the Catholic faith, and various different thought leaders like Dr. Wayne Dyer that what I and everyone else experiencing unhappiness needed was within us all along. But it has to be a conscious decision to choose Love and what makes us happy over being self-centered and bitter about not having what we want in our lives. This is another one of our greatest gifts, and honoring myself, aligning myself with my will guides me to Love, brings me more happiness than I have ever had in the past. Have there been some people that have not been happy with me? Maybe, but unless I am harming them in some way, I am not going to change my decision.
I have no ability to control the feelings of others, good or bad, only my own. I have done something very nice for someone in the past, and they might not have seemed to regard it at all. I have done very little for others, and they have been overjoyed and thankful. I have tried to be kind, and all that I got back was blame and anger. Is it true from your experiences? If you are in a place in your life where Love and happiness seems to have strings attached or be conditional to something outside yourself, take time to look at your situation in a very mindful non judgmental almost scientific way.
These are some resources that can us tell the difference between choosing happiness and people pleasing:
Dr. Susan Biali writes a very comprehensive article on how to know if you are a people pleaser and the risks to your own health and happiness associated:
How to Pursue Interest within Limits
Everyday, I am learning to have confidence in myself and faith that the money I am spending is helping me get to a place where I will be the most fulfilled. Being mindful of the joys that are currently in my life has greatly helped me be thankful for them. Being thankful helps me in knowing that I am where I need to be right now in my journey. This way I do not look to the celebrity world for what I should be investing my time in. Every moment in the world apart from the one/s promoted in media brings me teachers and guides in the form of kind people, animals, the blowing of the breeze, a flat tire, a task to be done with a co-worker, a store that I drove to being closed, a seam coming out in my pants, etc. None are made out of the fairy tails that we see on TV and in the movies, but to be thankful for the truth and not a fabrication, means that my thankfulness is not fabricated, and will serve as my guide to happiness through moments of peace and change alike. This is why I have found mindfulness so very important. Are you able to find peace in your present, and know that only goodness lies before you? Or, do you feel a longing that takes you away from those around and the joys that are waiting in the present?
These are some resources that can help us find faith and have courage in ourselves despite pressures that we may feel in life:
How to Regain Focus After a Hardship
If you are having this trouble in your life. Please know that you can choose to think differently. Your thoughts are your own. They are the only thing that we can really control. So make an effort no matter how small to change them. Tell yourself, “I am enough just as I am.” “I love you.” “Everything in my life happens in the right order.” “I am more than my problems.” “I am being led to far greater good and happiness than I can even imagine.” Say other inspirational words that you come across or make yourself (these are often the best). If your body gets tired, if a tragic circumstances comes into your life, or if you stop thinking in a positive forward way for any other reason, accept this, but reaffirm the above messages of self love as soon as you can. Smile and laugh at anything, any small thing that you are able to, open yourself up to joy and Love. This is the advice I give myself, and it always gets me through tough times when my thoughts become toxic. Holding out and working through that darkness always brings me back to a place of life, Love, clarity, and focus. When I can out last that weakness, when I trust in Love, I am inspired to be even more, do even more! I am re-energized and eager to live, Love, smile, and laugh!
I write about this matter, and give a lot of useful resources in my past blog:
How to Find Clarity and Joy in Fear
These are some resources that can help us find our greatest gifts and strengths within our deepest fears:
Yoga pose of the week
How do you find focus and clarity in your life? Please share some of the ways that you inspire yourself to find and keep moving along the path of Love and happiness so that we all might learn to Love ourselves better!
I am always looking for new topics to talk about. Please let me know what you would like to hear about that relates to self love and succeeding in life.
I am very grateful for your time in reading this, and I hope that it has inspired you to take some kind of steps in your own life to Love yourself more. I am always made better by having such amazing readers as yourself! May only goodness and Love lie before you!! <3 Aaron Szczurek :-)