Now let's try to find our rules, follow them, and always find joy knowing that we are living our Truth! “Smile experience, smile restraint, May joy always remain!” :-)
Why Do We Want to Follow Our Rules?
Motivation was revealed to be something that was found in the fear of scarcity. There seemed to never be enough time, money, skill, or me when I was striving for rewards like money, popularity, and material goods. Love is found in the abundance of inspiration. And that meant that I could rest easily, and move forward in the way that was natural for me, knowing that measuring myself against someone or something else would never truly reveal Love through me to others, or to myself. What I need will be there when I needed it if I can stay true to my wise adviser within. My rules guided me to follow Love beyond fear, and only a long drawn out misery of numbing myself to the Truth was the alternative. Are you happy, following what you know your rules, or are you trying believe they aren't that important? When I tried to believe that my rules of Love from my wise adviser within were not that important, it was telling me that I believed that I wasn't that important.
A good example of this is when Jesus says, 'my yoke is easy and my burden is light' (Matthew 11:30). Jesus is telling us that following His way, which is the way of unconditional Love, will lift the heavy burdens of external rules such as the 600 regulations that the Pharisees had imposed on the Jews for observation of the Sabbath. How heavy is your burden? This is a larger essay from gotquestions.org on this quote, explaining more detail. I really enjoy how they conclude, “The life lived by faith is a much lighter yoke and a much easier burden to carry than the heavy and burdensome yoke of self-righteousness under which some continually strive to make themselves acceptable to God through works.” http://www.gotquestions.org/yoke-easy-burden-light.html
I remember seeing “Yes Man” staring Jim Carry in 2008, and thought it was a great and very funny example of what happens if you start to live your life intentionally, following your rules and visa versa. His rule is very simple, he says yes to everything. It is very funny, but very truthful in that, once you start living without doubt in yourself, amazing experiences open up to you. I am not recommending that you say yes to everything, but do say yes to life. If learning Korean or how to play a guitar inspires you to embrace life more fully, go for it! It will lead to great things if you do it passionately! Here are some clips from the movie, and I do recommend the entire experience! :-)
How Do We Follow Our Rules?
I wish I had learned in school because it was fun to learn. I have had not had much luck in working when the only reward was money or material goods, but I Love the sense of fulfillment in knowing that I am providing a service that is useful. I try my best to follow legal rules because I want to contribute to a better world for us all, and I know that is their original intent. Threats of jail time and financial penalties just make me afraid of authorities. I have not been rewarded with many material goods in my life, but I am always finding an abundance of Love in those that I meet, especially since making it an intention to say yes to Love, and no to fear. I have also found that I truly have enough from my needs right now in my life.
I may not have what my ego wants, but my greatest self rule is “All you need is Love!” Not just the Beatles, but all of the great wise men and women that I have looked up to have acknowledged that anything worth doing is in the name of Love, whether in name or in deed. Jesus, Dr. Martin Luther King, Abraham Lincoln, Mother Teresa, Guru Iyengar and so many others. These are all individuals that the world can not stop remembering. I know that they lived their lives in a right way, and that not doing the same, to the best of my ability, would be living against my own Truth.
- “Smile Experience!”
- One way to find out about the your own self rules might be to look at what people you admire value.
- Another way would be to take the advice you would give to a younger version of yourself or someone that you truly Love.
- Pay special attention to things that “just feel right” or “just feel wrong” to you. You might notice that whenever you experience this you have an emotional responds either positive or negative. Your facial expression might change as well as your body language. Experiences throughout the day might also follow suit.
- Find the rules that the people you admired followed, and see if they feel right to you. ex.
- Jesus – the bible, especially the new testament
- Guru Iyengar – the yoga sutras
- Jesus – the bible, especially the new testament
- One way to find out about the your own self rules might be to look at what people you admire value.
- “Smile restraint!”
- Make sure that once you find your rules that you follow suit to the best of your ability.
- Try to live your rules throughout the day, in everything that you do. Don't compromise yourself, but remember that if you are not acting toward others in a Loving way, you are reflecting how you feel about yourself. Does that follow your self rule?
- Be very careful not to over think it! Your mind can play games, and make excuses if you let it. Be disciplined in your pursuit of your Truth! No one else can make you be you. Decide that you are worth it!
- Avoid random rules, interests, or ways that will lead you away from your rules. Brene Brown has a very good way to decide what this would look like. “What's worth doing even if you fail?” If it isn't something worth risking a great deal, it isn't within your rules.
- Avoid random rules, interests, or ways that will lead you away from your rules. Brene Brown has a very good way to decide what this would look like. “What's worth doing even if you fail?” If it isn't something worth risking a great deal, it isn't within your rules.
- Make sure that once you find your rules that you follow suit to the best of your ability.
- “May joy always remain!”
- No matter what happens! It may seem good or it may seem bad, but, if you are following your rules, find joy in it. Do not start doubting yourself like I have found myself doing from time to time. I always feel awful as a result. It makes sense when I realized that I was rejecting myself. Some emotional breakdowns later and it finally stuck.
- Celebrate yourself for following your own self rules by speaking to yourself with Love and encouragement. You are going down the right path, and good things are happening for you!
- No matter what happens! It may seem good or it may seem bad, but, if you are following your rules, find joy in it. Do not start doubting yourself like I have found myself doing from time to time. I always feel awful as a result. It makes sense when I realized that I was rejecting myself. Some emotional breakdowns later and it finally stuck.
How Uttanasana can Help Us Follow Our Rules!
I also mentioned that I realized that life didn't have to be lived in a state of fear. It is easier said than done though. So that is where yoga comes in for me. Not only does it have Yamas and Niyamas, restraints and observations, that can aid me in letting go of unhelpful stories that might cause me to fall into depression and other nasty emotions, but it also has asanas or postures that have helped me alter my feelings and thoughts in reaction to a physiological change. At first, these changes are brief, but they have gained permanence with each time practiced. For example, practicing Uttanasana or standing forward bend can calm the mind, and relieve depression because of the increased blood flow to the head. Guru B.K.S. Iyengar recommends that people suffering from depression should hold this posture for two minutes are more for relief from the condition.
Practicing yoga has become a very important part of my ability to live life by my rules, it helps me find relief whenever things start to get to cluttered and fearful in my mind. It is an important restraint from my own inner craziness and self loathing. Yoga reminds me that I am much more than my problems, but can feel contented in the Truth of Love. Now, if I have been practicing, I can wake up, and say yes to life! “Thank You, God, for another wonderful opportunity!”
Monique Minahan, a writer, yogi, and Lover of life, has also had difficulties with depression, but found relief in yoga. She writes about how yoga is being used to treat post traumatic stress disorder, and gives us five poses that will help reduce depression. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/intent/yoga-depression_b_2624004.html
Let's Practice Ustrasana! :-)
Technique
- CAUTION: If you have a back injury, make sure you practice Uttanasana with bent knees or practice Ardha Uttanasana. Demo by Yoga Works here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ppYwncp2vkw
- Standing in Tadasana or mountain pose. Here is an earlier article that I wrote, which has the technique for Tadasana: http://forselflove.weebly.com/blog/-how-to-make-2016-a-great-year-how-to-love-yourself-with-healing-and-hope
- Hinging at the hips, slowly lower your torso down, so that your upper body is parallel with the floor. Place your hands on your thighs.
- If this feels comfortable on the back, lower your torso down, sliding your hands down your legs to your shins, so that your back is at about 45 degrees from the point of you hips.
- If this is comfortable, you can lover your back all the way down so that it is in line with your legs. If rest your palms on the floor. CAUTION: Keep your knees bent if there is too much pain in the back of the legs. You might also touch your finger tips instead of palms to the floor.
- Hold this pose for as many breathes as you are able to.
- Recommended feel good practice: First, only follow these suggestions if they help you relax more. Remember the goal is relaxation. Simply breathing is enough in many cases, but these might deepen your experience.
- As you breathe try thinking to yourself the following sentence with each breath. “Smile experience!” inhale. “1” exhale. “Smile restrain!” inhale. “2” exhale. “May joy” inhale. “3” exhale. “always remain!” inhale. “4” exhale. Continue this as long as you would like.
- Smiling will help you relax even more.
- Think about a time in your life when you wish you would have followed your honest feelings rather than choosing something because fear crept in. For me this would mean choosing to connect with actual people in school, at social events, and at work, instead of spending most of my time retreating into virtual entertainment like video games. Forgive yourself for any disappointment that past decisions might have caused you. Then make an agreement with yourself to show some restraint when unhealthy feelings want to pull you in a direction that you know will ultimately cause you pain, breaking your most important self rules.
- Recommended feel good practice: First, only follow these suggestions if they help you relax more. Remember the goal is relaxation. Simply breathing is enough in many cases, but these might deepen your experience.
- Reverse steps 5 to 2, so that you come back to Tadasana. Thank yourself for taking another step in the direction of your best self. Remember to follow your rules and smile! :-)
Here is a great more in depth demonstration of Uttanasana, which includes benefits, tips, modifications, props, partnering, and variations. http://www.yogajournal.com/pose/standing-forward-bend/
Do you practice “Follow your rules?” Please share in the comments area here or on Face Book in the "For the Love of Self" discussion area some of the ways following your own rules has benefited the yourself and the world around you. What are some reasons you think this is so? Sharing about our own commitment to what we know to be true will help us all “Follow our rules.” Thank you, my friend, and keep on following what you know to be true!
If there is a topic you are passionate about or question that you would like answered about how to Love ourselves better, I would love to hear it. Please write a comment about it here or on Face Book in the "For the Love of Self" discussion area.
Thank you so much for taking time to reflect on “Following your rules” today! Following my own rules has been making such a difference for the better in the way that I care for myself and others. Things come more naturally, and seem like less of a burden. Writing this article has really helped me articulate this even further, bringing me one step closer to my true self, and true rule of Love. Practicing in what ever ways we can truly makes a deference! “Smile experience, smile restrain, may joy always remain!” May your Truth me with you! Aaron Szczurek <3 :-)