The postures in yoga known as balances have given me a way to think about the balances that we perform in life in a much more concrete way, because, in fact, these physical activities have a direct relationship to how I approach situations outside of standing on one foot for a period of time or standing on my head. Haven't you ever wondered why someone would take part in such a bizarre behavior. I suppose that I did at some level, but more so this activity held a deep fascination and mystery for me. And why is that? There is a saying that when things are needed in your life, they arrive, and the answer to this mystery came to me after I became way off balance in my life. At points, I even thought that it would be far better to end it all than go on in such a suffering state. That is an important insight about balance that my experience has relieved to me. Another is that pain is part of the experience of life, but suffering is optional. When I experienced times of balance in my thoughts and emotions the suffering dissipated, and even seemed to leave me.
This balance that we try to achieve in any aspect of life is a balancing of the way we feel about a situation that we are living through. It is not the situation that needs to change, but, rather the way that we feel about a situation. The evidence for this is the way that winners and loser approach life, setting aside that black and white or good and bad of popular meanings surrounding these words. Winners try again when they fall down and losers simply get lost in the falling, not to get back up. So understanding this is a mental game that we play with ourselves is key to finding a balance in life. For me, the key is in understanding that the so called winners are not necessarily winners at all, but rather individuals that have been able to roll with the punches and live life happily with contentment, rather that staying attached to a fixed idea about what should or should not be.
Attachment is also key in balancing, because, for me, attachment is like a rope that will pull you to one side or the other, and if that direction does not match my image of what should be, I end up upset. If it happens to match that the should image then I run into the fear of things not always happening the way that they did to make me happy. The external things that happen in the world like families we are born into, cultures that have set certain expectations for us before we were even born, bills that we have to pay to maintain the quality of life we have come to expect, car accidents, death of loved ones, storms, wars, to name some of the less pleasant ones, are all seemingly outside of our control. However, what if there wasn't a clear meaning of unpleasantness to them, could they be pleasant, could there be a way to live that might be pleasant alongside them that we do not see because we only see the unpleasantness. The writings that follow will be an exploration on how to reflect on events in a more balanced way. I will do my best to describe certain situations in a way that leads not to attachment to right, wrong, win, lose, but rather equanimity and a grace that prevails our often, limited vision of the possibilities that lye before us.
If you think it would be of some benefit to you, start to actively think about balance in your life. Is there a way that balance in your life can be enrich? Is there a situation that feels out of sorts every time you enter into it? Why is that? How might the concept of balancing this part of your life help in making it feel in line with how you would like it to be or feel?
Until next time...
May everything feel as it should feel for you and who you are.
Much love and wellness,
Aaron :-)